A shattered world, an unexpected new emergence;

Scared and frightened brain with old important memories;

Actions aligned according to karmic principles;

These actions we take, bear fruit and perhaps innocent;

We are front reeling a mind that is useful and new.

A mind that is open, able to feel more deeply;

Experience the environment sensitively;

The shadows move outside and inside and within us;

As the light is our guide, a still source, a gleam, a lamp;

The brain injury can become an awakening;

Creation and amending between the old and new;

Perhaps slower, either way, solace by good people;

Mind working, generating thoughts, ideas, and words;

Views carry and change with the winds of cosmic wisdom;

Openness, love and grace have more room to flow into;

An invisible injury sensed internally ;

An invisible injury sensed externally;

Something mighty to hide and to share vigilantly;

I grab the hand of my man, my sister and I smile;

It’s going to be really well for those who love.

Eyes and Brain

Digital art, the artist’s face is see behind different clip arts of a brain, divided in 3 horizontal sections

Black and Purple Brain

Digital art of a purple brain, with the shadows of a forrest superimposed over it.

Tomato Brain Close Up

A close-up of a what appears to be a neuron, but is in fact digital overlaid images of tomatoes and pine leaves to look like a neuron. Colours are purple, green and pink.

Miracle Mountain Collection

‘Miracle Mountains’ was the first time I was able to successfully paint what I had wished. This watercolor took me many days to do what used to take me less than an hour. Finishing this painting was a complete miracle that I could paint what I had envisioned in my mind.

A collection of 20 paintings shown here as a five by four quilt of watercolour. In each painting, there is a mountain range. There are trees dotting the borders of some of the paintings. The colours are warm, earthy tones of terracotta, rose, plum, with greens trees in varying hues. Behind the mountains are blue skies, some with warm glowing sunsets, others with fluffy white clouds.

Creativity Still Exists Collection

A Traumatic Brain Injury couldn’t stop me from relearning to paint and read. Creativity still exists but it was a slow process. I imagined it, prayed, and believed, ‘I got this!’ I was unable to read, focus, work, remember, problem solve, drive, cook, watch movies, or listen to music.

Miracles are real, gratitude helps, and small progress is a big deal.

My original watercolor paintings tell a story of hope, heart, and healing. The ultimate goal is to spread hope.

A collection of 15 paintings shown here as a 5 by 4 quilt in watercolour. Each painting is abstract, with splashes of colour. The artist uses blue, purple, orange, green and yellow in varying hues. Brush strokes connect some of the splashes across the painting as though implying movement.

1: A low resolution manipulated video still. On the left side, half of a white woman’s face is shown up close. She has short black hair, is wearing large black rimmed glasses, red lipstick and is smirking. In the middle of the frame, you see a smaller version of the same woman looking at herself in the mirror in a red, green and yellow tone, with blue and purple tones at the bottom-right of the image.

2: An abstract collage capture of 8 video grabs and distortions. Two frames wide by four frames long. Each image captures a different facial expression or full body pose of a woman, all with different colour tones and effects.

3: A picture created using linework and colours. A large sky-blue face is in the middle of the picture, with red lips, green eyes and a third green eye, without an eyebrow, in the centre of the forehead. The face is smiling with teeth showing. The hair is short, pink and purple toned curls that span the whole width of the top of the frame. The face is surrounded on all sides by flowers of different shapes, sizes and various colour combinations amongst a black backdrop.

Brain Injury Puzzle

An image of a brain with cut outs of puzzle pieces missing from the brain. The missing pieces are scattered on the outside of the brain. The brain and puzzle pieces are made of leather. There is a green ribbon in the bottom right hand corner. This image is placed in a frame that has a thick wood boarder with a thin black trim surrounding the wood.

Perseverance

Perseverance is a piece of art of the side profile of a black and white leopard. It has been carefully crafted out of leather, and sits on a black leather background. It is another piece I’ve created for the Strength Within Series to allow us to recognize our own internal strength. A black and white image of the side profile of a leopard in front of a black background. This image is placed in a black frame.

Confidence

Confidence is a portrait of a black and white gorilla, looking sideways at you. It has been fully crafted out of leather. The idea behind this piece is a combination of the reasoning behind the Strength Within Series, as well as the fact that your confidence might be completely shattered at times. It is something we need to rebuild, step by step. And while we might be unable to see how to do this at times, if we keep working on it, we will be stronger on the other end.  We can be just as strong and confident as this gorilla looks, if we believe it and work on it.

A black and white image of a gorilla’s face looking sideways in front of a black background. This image is placed in a black frame.

Languishing

A distressed, nude woman, with white skin and long dark hair. The woman is pulling the top of her head apart from the center, revealing a red interior. Featured in front of a grey and green blended background.

Grid of Emotions

A collage of 12 individual paintings. From left to right:

• A silhouette of a body that has fallen under water.

• A first person point of view of hands in front of kitchen sink and a damaged wall that reveals a striped pattern in the crack.

• A silhouette looking into mirror in a dark room.

• A metal vice clamping a person’s head.

• A small sailboat in a rough wavy sea under the moonlight.

• A portrait of a faceless woman, with a red hallow circle where her face was.

• A person sticking their head through a wall that appears liquefied.

• A distressed person bending their knees and grabbing their head that is shaped like a rectangle that is a blend of pink, yellow and white. The person is wearing a sweater and jeans.

• An abstract image with multicolored layers stacked on one another.

• An abstract image of an individual turned upside down. The body appears liquefied and melting in multicolor.

• An image of an insect like creature, putting a red object over the head of a bright blue colored human crouching to the ground.

• A staircase leading up to a person’s head which has a door over the face. An individual opens the door and inside is an image of a person crouching with their hands on their head.

Longing for Tuscany

A landscape paining of a small home situated on rolling green hills, with tall bushy trees and a blue sky.

1: Bright and vibrant multi-coloured abstract painting, featuring a mix of different shades of green, blue, pink, yellow and red.

2: An abstract multi-coloured painting, featuring a mix of blue, yellow, gold, brown, green and white.

3: A vibrant multi-coloured abstract painting, featuring a mix of yellow, orange, red, black and white with black dots placed throughout. There is a torn piece of paper in the top left hand corner of the painting which reads: “Needs, wants, desires, choosing, owning the together whisper of my [image of a heart] being receptive and calming with assertiveness everything that brings me closer to wholeness to the liveliness of my being…”

Look at my Pain

A digital art piece with a navy blue background along with hints of black. Spread across the piece are silhouettes of slender people with varying heights and postures. There are small blotches of red on the top left, almost resembling blood.

Untitled

At the center of this digital piece is a man coloured in black and outlined with white, with long green hair. He is wearing cloth on his lower body in a burnt orange colour. There are two ambiguous figures to his right and left side.

Masking Judgements Regarding Ableism

An abstract depiction of a face. The background is made up of shades of navy blue and light brown. The face has 3 eyes, with a symmetrical pattern and a geometric nose and lips. The face is in the shape of a semicircle.

Taylor Swift

A painting of singer Taylor Swift, with her blond hair swept up. She is wearing a tiara.

Barack Obama

A painting of Barack Obama wearing a suit. He is smiling.

Flowers

A painting of green stems and leaves of various sized pink, orange, white, yellow, and purple flowers in a square.

White Noise

A pencil sketch of a woman kneeling down with her back against a door. She is sipping a drink and is wearing headphones.

She's Ok

Reminding me to Be patient with myself. It’s okay that I spent a week on this. It’s okay that it’s imperfect. My recovery is a process. The process is more important than the outcome. The attempt is what matters. Working through my brain injury is painful. I am grateful I found a craft and a means to support my healing process. Physically, emotionally, spiritually.

A coloured sketch of two women. The woman on the left is brunette. The woman on the right is blonde, wearing sunglasses, and has a skull tattoo on her upper arm.

She's Still Ok

Black and white sketch of previous two women.

A picture, drawn in pencil, in a sketchbook with black spine. The light in the picture is tinted blue. The picture is a sketch of a stick drawing of a torso with a big, exaggerated brain. Inside the brain, the artist has written “cerebrum”. The artist has written comments all around the image, including: “pain,” “My Mild Traumatic Brain Injury”, “Cognitive Problems”, “Word Finding”, “Headaches,” “Brain Crashes Against the Skull”, “Mood Swings,” “Irritability,” “Feelings of Sadness”, “Irritability”.

Enchanted

An abstract picture, mostly shot in black and white, of a mess of bright white wires. Blue-green and very thin wires are behind the bright white ones.

Nature’s Artist

A black and white close up picture of a tree, without bark, with a naturally-occurring swirly carved imprint on it.

Laying Down Your Roots

A black and white close up picture of a tree’s thick roots, growing into the ground.

Sunflower Extraordinaire

A photograph of a stem full of vibrant sunflowers.

Lake Kagawong (Manitoulin), 5 hour kayak

A photograph of an open lake with a rock face partly covered in bushy green trees.

Monarch Display

A close up photograph of a Monarch butterfly.

10 000 Broken Feathers

An icon image of a person. The right half, the icon is blue and the background is white. The left half, the icon is white and the background is blue. On the left side, there are white feathers and pieces of gold coloured necklaces attached.

Destruction of Memory

This digital art piece is in portrait format, with a light blue background. In the centre of the piece, a distorted and stylized figure is squeezed into an egg-shaped oval, with its feet and one hand pressing forward. The oval is outlined in a fine blue jagged line, inside which a wider red line outlines the oval, enters the face at the forehead, and fills the nose and mouth. The figure is dressed in bright blue. The feet, hands and face are a light chartreuse.

Embryo

Accompanying Poem:

trapped
alive and whole
complete
fully developed
living like an embryo
able yet not capable
contained
isolated and cramped

my thoughts collect and jumble
and I tumble
in the darkness
where nothing hatches
nothing sees light
trapped by crack
inside myself
inside my brain

This digital art piece is in portrait format, with a light blue background. In the centre of the piece, a distorted and stylized figure is squeezed into an egg-shaped oval, with its feet and one hand pressing forward. The oval is outlined in a fine blue jagged line, inside which a wider red line outlines the oval, enters the face at the forehead, and fills the nose and mouth. The figure is dressed in bright blue. The feet, hands and face are a light chartreuse

1:An acrylic and water colour painting of a farm. A short stone wall and wooden gate separate the foreground and background of the frame. In the back is a dirt path road, three apple trees, two  barn houses, a black rooster and a two white butterflies. In the foreground, a curvaceous brunette woman wearing glasses stands in centre frame, wearing denim shorts, black knee-high boots, and a blue bra. She is wearing red lipstick and red nail polish, along with a red bandana and bracelets and has a yellow halo above her head. She has 5 sheep and a pug around her, and is petting one sheep with her right hand and holding a cane behind her back with her left.

2:A larger set woman wearing all black and a black headscarf is seen from behind looking out of her kitchen window. The kitchen is a blue-green and the window is framed with a beige brick, with a toaster on the counter on the left side of the frame and two red apples on the counter on the right. The window overlooks a town with several beige houses with black roofs, two cars, two boats, and a water-way. The top half of the view outside the window depicts a branch of an apple tree, with several ripe red apples growing off of it with green leaves.

3: Four cream-toned wood paneled houses with black roofs and red doors appear amidst a blue sky and large green trees in the top half of the photo. In the foreground, the top half of two red boats rest on some shrubbery. There is a pole in the foreground in the middle of the frame with two telephone wires draped along either side at the top, with two birds sitting on the wires on the right side.

Slow Down For April

Image of two barren trees with pink buds starting to grow surrounded by swirls of pink ribbons.  The artist writes:  “2020 is a strange year and it seems cold to share news by email. … The breast cancer is in my brain and now I am terminal… The journey has been decades long but not a cancer battle … April will continue to arrive and when it does please enjoy the cherry blossoms for me!”

Yes, There Will Be Apples

A watercolour painting of a tree, with leaves starting to grow. The tree is in front of other trees in the background.

Winter at the Cottage

A watercolour painting of barren trees and deep snow in the winter. There is a small path between the trees.

The Rats in My Brain is a commentary on the new obstacles that one experiences in life after a brain injury. The rats appear feral to represent that these daily difficulties and struggles are unique to each individual’s mind and personal traumatic experience. A painting of a woman’s face with pink cheeks and white skin, floating in a yellow background. She has blue eyes, and big bags under them indicating she is tired. coming out of her head are three rats.

“I sat in my anger for a while … until I realized it was in fact grief all along. they said I changed a lot, but I wonder if they realize how much I went through a lot changed me." @invisblescar

Abstract painting of mostly purple, with blue and yellow swirls of colour.

1: An abstract painting of a mountainous landscape with a waterfall and blue sky.

2: A painting of a person in a black cloak and British looking school uniform (green tie, grey blazer, white shirt). They have white hair and their face is blank without eyes, a nose, mouth or ears. 

A drawing of a yellow race car and a drawing of an old fashioned drag racing car. The car is blue and has a flame painted on the side.

All close up coloured photos of flowers.

“Bright lights represent the hope that things will get better soon.”

Nuclear: Blinded By The Light

The light is about how you see things, which is why this image has many colours. It’s about the colour spectrum and atoms.

The words “What People Can’t See” are written on four corners of the page, repeated three times on each corner, in letters that go from larger to smaller. In the centre of the image is a clip art image of an atom. Inside the centre of the symbol are some ovals which look like flower pedals, or perhaps are made to look like an eye. On both side of the symbol, the artist has written the words, “Injury, Emotions, Humour, Justification, Love, Light, Life.

Uphill: Earth Struggle 

The words “Mother Earth Our Struggle” are written on four corners of the page. In the centre of the image, surrounded by a thick, dark circle is a snow covered mountain (clip art, coloured by the artist) in front of a sunset of yellow, orange and red behind it. The side of the mountain facing the viewer is covered in snow. A person with a walker is trying to climb the mountain. On the left side is someone with a wheelchair at the base of the mountain. A person with a cane is climbing to the top of the mountain.

Invisible: Like the wind my love

The words “Mind Open Free Heart” are written on four corners of the page. In the centre of the image, there’s a printed clip art of the element of wind. The mix of wind and colours represents sunrise and sunset.

A drawing representing my brain cells, colourful and warped.

A drawing of multiple brain cells (depicted with flat, multicoloured circular shapes all jumbled together). The colours include: pink, blue, white, fuchsia, green, yellow and purple.

Just What The Doctor Ordered

The featured image is a woman in glasses rendered in black and white.  Around her there are detailed patterns from nature as well as geometric forms, also rendered in black and white.  Pastel shades in the foreground highlight a bird, mushrooms and flowers.

Untitled

This work has vivid green orange and blue details. There is a woman at the centre of this work. Her head is divided into two halves. From the viewer’s perspective, the left has a portion of the skull cut away to reveal a blue and grey brain. The face is cracked with red streaks emanating from her eye. The right side of the face is uninjured, with beautiful features and a quiet smile.  Above the woman, we see the words, “don’t think about it, and you’ll be fine.”  The words are bordered by pills and capsules. Below the woman we see a classic Japanese style wave form.

If I start from the very beginning, my story will be hard for me to say.

Even though so much time has passed, I still find myself frustrated, overwhelmed, and crying on any given day.

So, here is my story as far back as I can go.I knew, I felt, my brain had changed somehow.

Then, came the knock on my door, and the answers had arrived now.As explained to me by an Occupational Therapist, an Acquired Brain Injury Therapist, and a Social Worker, sat down, and informed me how my brain will now function and how my life will now be.  

I got up from my chair, and said to them upon leaving I refuse all their help, and, said, “Please, don’t judge me.”

I sit on my own with no memory of things that I do.I can’t read a book because I have no memory of that too.I go to the grocery store.  

My vision is poor due to the acquired brain injury.  

The people in the aisles just stare at me.  

All I asked of them was “Please, don’t judge me.”

I have a hard time talking on the phone, and the man starts yelling at me.

All I asked of him was “Please, don’t judge me.”

My former co-workers visit with me and speak with me loudly as if I could not hear what they had to say.

What kind of foolishness is this?

Why this way?

They looked into my eyes.  

So close to my face.

They saw what they wanted to see.

All I asked of them as they were leaving, was, “Please, don’t judge me.”

I try to put together something to eat.It’s so hard for me to do because my ingredients are so incomplete.

I must let this go.

Please let this be.

I must remember, “Please, don’t judge me.”

Being alone and afraid, I feel there is nothing I can do.

“Oh yes there is!! Get up off your butt, and make that phone call to the ABI team so they can begin to help you!”

The team came back to my home, and sat with me.

All they asked at the conclusion of their discussions, (with smiles on their faces), in unison, “Please, don’t judge me.”

After they left, I began making some changes in my life you see.

Please, not worry; all for the good.

“Please, don’t judge me.”

This work has a scalloped shape resembling a flower. It is painted with concentric circles with blue at the outside, organge, red yellow, blue and orange.

Re: Brainstormed

A brainstorm with many words and statements on it, printed in thin permanent marker. The brain is made up of different pink lines. Printed and ripped up clip art stickers which are little brains and little stickers of thunder images are scattered throughout the image. Words include: Agreements + Practices Learning Advocacy Global Programs and Services, Data Tech Software, – ing Need, Scarce and Poor (left side)  Abundant, Rich Needs (right side), Understand, See, Hear, Barriers. Inside the brain words are:  nepanila, intersectionality, survival strategies and restorative practices.

Re born: set again

A printed clipart of a laptop computer. Instead of letters in their usual places, the keyboard reads (from back to front) ‘MEMORY’ ‘MEMORY’; ‘NOW’ ‘NOW’ ‘NOW’ ‘NOW’!’ ‘BABY’ ‘ROXY’ BABY’ !?; ‘AGAIN’ ‘AGAIL’ ‘AGAIN’; ‘LEARN’ ‘RESET REBOOT’ LEARN’. On the monitor a sketch of a baby’s face that was drawn on another piece of paper, ripped out and placed so it looks like it is coming out of the monitor. ABI written is on the paper and says ‘Baby Roxy’. The child has a stern look on its face.

Re: Learn Purposed

A clipart of a laptop. Instead of letters in their usual places, the keyboard reads (from back to front) ‘ROXY’ repeated until the front two lines of the keyboard which say ‘THANK YOU’. The space bar says “GRATEFUL’. Above the laptop are the words ‘SORRY TEACHER SORRY’. The top of the screen of the laptop says ‘ME’ repeatedly. The bottom of the screen says Before, Before, Before, BEFORE … Inside the laptop are two pictures of the artist. On the left, the artist, a young woman, has a shaved head after brain surgery, where part of her skull has been removed resulting in a dent on the left side of her head. On the right side is the artist with long hair, staring at the camera, presumably before her brain injury. Around the laptop are words, and many small old time watches, cut from clipart. Between the pictures the artist has written, ‘ABI Survivor’ with a drawn compass arrow going up and down. Below the pictures the artist has written, ‘Who am I’ Words include, “Death”, “Thank you” “Survive” “Please” “Life!” “Lessons” (written three times) and “Life!” (repeated six times.)

All My Spoons – Awareness Ribbon Shadowbox

A white shadowbox with a pink ribbon inside. Written on the box is, “I would give ALL my spoons to you” in cursive.

Zen Mandala Shadowbox

A white shadowbox with a zen mandala inside. The colours are a golden yellow background, with green, pink, light pink and white. ‘Zen’ is written on the bottom left.

Sunset

A painting of a sunset, with the shadows of trees and a sky filled with stars.

1: This abstract works feature organic forms in grey tones with tints of pink. The forms resemble water-bubbles trapped in ice.   The viewer has the perspective of looking through the luminescent figures as if looking up through the frozen surface of water to the sky behind.

2: This abstract work is shown in shades of grey and white, with a very subtle pink tint in small areas. The texture resembles sand that has been shaped by water. There are fine ridges throughout the middle of the work, with areas of greater depth and texture that resemble a dry riverbed.

3: This work features organic forms that resemble water trapped in ice, in tones of black and warm grey.  This image has areas of red tinting.  There is an area of blue in the center.  The effect is as if looking through frozen mirky water to through a hole which reveals blue sky above.

Orions Bow

This work is rendered in tones of black and grey, with subtle lines of pink, green and blue outlining a central dark figure. There is a white wide chevron at the top of the work.

Glaciers

This  work depicts a white ice-covered mound at the left and a dark mound on the right as banks of a river which is rendered in a deep blue. The scene resembles a fjord.

Pyramid Lake

This abstract work has areas of blue, green and red as well as purple in a form that resembles a lake. There is a triangular figure in the background which resembles a snow covered mountain. The top half of the work, which resembles a sky is rendered in shades of mauve with a glow that brings to mind a son on the horizon.

Silent Epidemic: is a piece I’ve created to portray my own experiences enduring Traumatic Brain Injuries. I want to raise awareness for a quiet, devastating injury that is under-acknowledged.

The tryptic is a journey of frustration, devastation, isolation, remembering, and healing. I’ve chosen to present myself in this pose to depict poise, dignity, and grace with a head held high. The text amidst the background is not noticeable at first glance, displaying how an injury to the brain can be remarkably silent, invisible, and quietly powerful. How only those close enough can recognize the pain and trauma in persevering through a wound that has absorbed my being from the inside out. Beautiful chaos from a life-changing force.

Three black and white images. From left to right: a side profile of a white woman with long hair wearing a black dress. Her eyes are closed and her head is slightly arched; the middle image is of the same woman, same pose with white and black cube shapes exploding out of the top of her head, leaving pinkish blood-like streaks dripping down; the right image is of the same woman but instead of her face you see her skull and brain. On the top of her brain there is a red mark implying injury.

Metamorphosis:

“We delight in the beauty in the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.”

Transformation is not a kind place, but rather a place of rebirth. We can learn so much from the caterpillar that grows its butterfly wings in the ache of darkness. We shed the past and emerge. These are the seasons of change, as we grow to be free and beautiful with wings to fly. Where to truest parts of you can emerge and you begin to transition into the most intuitive and vibrant canvas of yourself.

Sketch of a white woman wearing glasses with long hair. She is black and white, but has orange, white and black monarch butterfly wings on her back. The left wing appears to be injured and cut. The top of the poster reads “Turn Pain into Power. “There are many statements in the poster written in yellow, pink and orange, such as: “Your body is a battleground,” “The beauty of you is how you wear who you are,” “Revolution,” “You do not have to wake up and become the butterfly,” “This too shall pass.”